What now seems like a life time ago, I self published three books.
In my ignorance of the mechanics of self publishing, they did not do as well as my hopes and dreams desired. Because of that, and a few other reasons, I walked away from the process. I needed and wanted better. If I am going to put my heart and soul into a book, my hope is that I could manage a little better than breaking even. I’m kidding myself, I want the book(s) to do well, very well, exceedingly-incredibly-amazingly well.
Two of the books are inspirational poetry. One being free style. I actually had people tell me reading the poems in that book reminded them of reading the Psalms in the Bible. And even though I would never put myself on the same level as David, I felt honored and humbled by the comments. The second poetry book was all rhyming poetry. Again, meant to inspire and uplift.
The third book was a magical creation that began as a poetry challenge that morphed into a full length novel. I thought it would be more young adult reading but I have had many of my age group who loved it even with this misleading title. The Legend of Dragon’s Doom: A Young Warrior’s Vow sounds like just another kill the dragon story which is isn’t.
I really enjoyed writing this story as the characters followed me around everywhere I went making sure to tell me the next events. Even waking me in the night to share points. Who needs sleep right? There are lives to save and secrets to bring to light. I even ended up with coworkers acting as if the characters were real to them as well.
Before I became disillusioned with everything I had written two more books of the sequel. I still have the manuscripts saved over in the corner. A wish and a dream and a hope but not much more at the moment.
I have other partially complete manuscripts over on my desk. Different topics covered in each one. One on the loss of my husband. One on my cancer battle. One on the battle against loneliness. All partially complete, all feeling abandoned.
I’ve tried researching self publishing to see where I went wrong with the other three. I feel as if I need to know more, to know what avenue to use for each project. I feel at times like someone lost on the ocean on a cloudy night and no compass. There are a lot of different directions one could travel, but how do you know which is the right way? There is so much information and misinformation finding the correct path and knowing it is the correct path isn’t always easy.
I don’t want a book out there, just to have a book out there if that makes sense. I want there to be a purpose for it being, I want the reader to take something away with them when they turn that final page. I want it to have value. Not saying that the other three don’t.I don’t feel the failure with the three, because I did finish them. I did publish them. I even sold some. I simply want to do better.
What brings this all up now?
That aforementioned surprise. When I checked the mail today, the only thing in the box was one letter. A royalty check from the place where my three books are still very much available. It isn’t very big, but the fact it arrived at all has me all excited. Someone out there, is still buying these books. Even without advertising, even without promotion, even without effort on my part. Oh yes, that was a very nice surprise.