September Twenty-fourth; A photo or two to pass the time

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Day 266; Footnotes on Waiting, Waiting, Waiting…Still Waiting

Didn’t show.

I sat here all day, waiting. There was no delivery of parts at any point during the day. The only thing the mail carrier left in my mailbox was a post card from someone wanting to buy my house. It was funny the way they had my name written up on the card all twisted around. I have no intention of selling so those are a minor annoyance that usually don’t even make it inside if I take the side step to the outside trash.

When my son got in from work I told him nothing showed. When he checked the tracking he told me it should be here tomorrow. Both deliveries. Fine. I’ll get up, get dressed and make my grocery list. If they haven’t arrived by the time I’m ready to run my errands, I’ll bring the dogs inside and they can drop the packages off inside the fence. My son said that the packages will be heavy so at least one if not both trucks will need to pull down the drive unless they have hand trucks.

We spend a lot of time waiting. We wait in lines shopping. We wait at traffic signals. We wait at restaurants. We wait for packages. We wait for phone calls, for meetings to begin, for meetings to end, for the work day to end. The list is infinite.

Currently we are waiting on this pandemic situation to end. Waiting for the world to return to some form of normalcy and calm. We are waiting for the conspiracies, the false information, the threats to stop and truth to overcome. We are waiting for a world seemingly gone mad to calm down.

There are those of us who are waiting for our life to return to a position of what we remember. Whether it is with a job, health, finances, social, overcoming grief, break up. We wait, and we work on helping resolve the issues. By sending out resumes, filling out applications, exercise, eating better, finding ways to safely be with others.

Ever so often, someone will come along and tell the world that the end of times will be on such and such a day. Look to the sky for the return of the King. They have translated secret passages, they have worked it out mathematically, they have sleuthed it out some how. Then, when it doesn’t happen, hasn’t happened, they start back peddling. Some have come back later and said, I was mistaken, I didn’t do this or that or the other thing correctly. The new date when the world will end is definitely without doubt, such and such. I had someone years ago tell me that Christ had already returned and we were in the midst of the tribulation. This was twenty or so years ago and since the Tribulation period will only last seven years, I think they were incorrect.

Jesus the Christ Himself said, no one knows but the Father when the time will be for His return. Not  the angels, not even Jesus Himself, only the Father. So for man to say he knows by this or that or some other manner, is foolishness.

 We don’t know when He will return. What do we do in the mean time, while we wait? This is just one site, use your favorite search engine for more information on what to be doing while waiting. Ask fellow Believers. Ask those you know who know the Bible, and live the Word spiritually and not in earthly, twisted ways. Listen to God’s Word, not man’s. We should live to please God, not man.

We wait. We watch. We live our lives in a way that is firm in Belief, strong in conviction, built on love. Love, for all. Sharing with all. Waiting, with a heart built on the faith and hope of what is to come. Not running out and stocking up on supplies. Not gathering ammunition for stock piled weapons. Not barricading doors of a secure fortress. We wait. We watch. We share what we know. The love of Christ. The love for all. He came for us all once, He will return for us all when the time is right.

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September Twenty-third, He Is Coming

They’re coming.

At some point today parts are coming for my son’s car. Parts that will be heavy. No, I have no idea when they will arrive as he had no window to give me. I was going to the store, but now, I have to wait on this delivery. We have never had expected packages stolen and to my knowledge we have never had unexpected packages stolen. That isn’t so much the worry. I have been leaving both dogs outside more often when I leave for short time periods and since the bushes hide the fence delivery people do not know it is there. All they know is suddenly two big dogs are furiously barking and growling at them. I’ve seen the reactions of many and it is obvious they have had encounters that did not end well. I have also seen their expressions when I suddenly appear and meet them halfway.

If I know a delivery time, or know when someone is coming by for what ever reason, I bring the dogs inside and confine them to this room. If I don’t know, I can’t. My yard is securely fenced, I see no reason I can’t allow my dogs run of their own yard. Especially since the training collars are doing an amazing job of getting them to listen better. Bella hates the thing and responds to that beep before I have time to release the button.

But I know they are coming at some point today. Knowing that I have been dressed for a while now. No need to frighten anyone by appearing  in my jammies and robe. Or as my son calls it, my retirement uniform.

My son told me what was coming. He’s replacing and upgrading brake parts for his car. You know, the important stuff that makes the car stop. I don’t know how much the overheating or simply the desire to have better played a part in his purchase decision. All I know is that the parts are coming and will arrive some time today.

The annoying thing is I have no idea what time. I had plans, errands that need to be run. Time I wanted to spend out and about just because. Only, the parts are coming, I need to be ready. I could let my parents know that the parts are coming, but all they would be able to do is watch from a distance as the delivery guy walks down my driveway with the box or boxes. They can’t really do for me, what only I could do.

The return of Jesus the Christ is like that. We know he is coming, we don’t know when. If we have accepted what He did for us, dying on the cross for our sins He is coming for us. If we ask for and accept His forgiveness, mercy, and grace, given freely, He is returning for us. If our name, is written in the Book of Life, He is coming for us. At some unknown point.

We know He is coming. We understand we need be ready at all times. No, we don’t simply stop living and doing and wait. But be ready. Ask and receive. No one can do it for us, only we can seek for ourselves. Others can and should pray for us, but they can’t make the decision. We can fence in our life and set out the guard dogs, but even they can’t prevent His coming. They will not bark to announce His arrival. What we need do, all we can do, is be ready. To get our life right with Him, accept Him and the great love He has for us.

We know, He is coming. What a day of rejoicing that will be.

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After Midnight

I’m sitting here, as I have done many nights. Procrastinating in going to bed. And I’m not sure why.

I don’t have a set schedule. I don’t have a job that I have to get up and get ready for. I don’t have young children or grandchildren to care for. So it really doesn’t matter if I stay up. Mom will call around 8:30 in the morning. If I oversleep it won’t be the first time, still if she wakes me it bothers her.

Molly is behind me sprawled out on her dog bed and Bella is already stretched out on my newly made bed. I remembered just in time that I had stripped it to wash the sheets and had not remade it yet. making her wait in here, I went and made the bed. It was easier and less confusing for her to make her wait. Yes, I have done this before and that time forgot until I had to try to get her off the unmade bed.

I am sitting here, the light of the lamp filling the room. I can hear the crickets outside and the ceiling fan turning over my head. In the other room a radio plays old time rock and roll. When I passed my son’s bedroom door a few moments ago, I heard him talking with someone so he hasn’t called this night done yet either.

I think that part of this is the changing of the season. I don’t care for the shorter days and less sunlight. I’ve dealt with seasonal issues for a long while, but I always make it through. I will this time as well.

I think that part of it is the stress of the things needing done, such as the wood stove.

I think part of it, is lack of conversation. Those long in general conversations where you discuss what ever topic comes up in detail. Conversations that can last thirty minutes or three hours.

I think part of it is not working. Not feeling a part of a team, not bringing in a paycheck.

I think part of it is the concern in my heart for those around me who are suffering in different ways, and I am helpless in every way, but prayer.

I think that part, is there is an unsettled feeling in my spirit. A feeling that I should be doing more than I am. That I should be doing something different. That I need to doing an action that bears fruit, that has results. Though I am unsure what.

I think that a part, is my looking back at what once was, and see how life is now so different. I made a lot of mistakes, learned a lot of lessons the hard way. Things happened that had me fearing the worse, but now here I am, so many years later. Why? There is a purpose, I know that much.

I know, that there is a reason for every day of our life. Our words and actions have results. Whether the results are good or bad, depends largely on those actions. Are we positive or negative? Encouraging or discouraging? Do we build or dismantle?

Right now, as the minutes tick by, I will place my trust in the Lord. I will call this a time to go rest and prepare for tomorrow should it come. I will speak with the Lord and fall asleep knowing, that He is in control and He does have a plan. That in the end, all of these things that prey on my peace of mind, can be calmed with a word. No matter what hour of night or day it may be.

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Day 265; How Much Wood Would a Wood Stove Burn if a Wood Stove Could Burn Wood or Smoke Screen Anyone?

Autumn. Rats.

I managed to make it through the summer and not turn on the central air conditioning one time. Open windows and ceiling fans made it perfectly comfortable for me. My son, has a window unit so his room was comfortable for him. The fact that the door my husband installed to his bedroom has a gap at the top, allowed some of that conditioned air out to cool that end of the house a bit also helped. I can tolerate heat, my son can if he has to but would rather not. I cannot tolerate cold. My son doesn’t get cold unless the temperature has fallen to a point well below freezing. It doesn’t bother him. If I get too cold, I feel it all the way to my bones and it takes me forever to get warm.

We have a gas pack furnace/ ac unit. I just need propane. We have a thirty-two year old wood stove that needs minor repair, but I do have wood.

The wood stove has a metal plate that bolts on the inside at the top.The problem is that all the nuts, unknown to me, had worked loose over time and fallen into the stove. Without knowing, when I cleaned out the ashes, the nuts went out with the ashes. Eventually that metal plate fell. That plate has something to do with directing the smoke and or preventing the flames from reaching the catalytic converter that is in that stove. That converter can’t be any good now, but who knows. I do know that the stove will not function without that plate in place. I tried. Smoked up the house badly, scared me and the cat. Anyway…. my son found nuts to fit, but the washers he chose, didn’t. When I walked down to my folk’s today to relocate mom’s cactus from the front porch back inside the house, I asked dad if he had any washers that would fit. I had one of the ones that didn’t with me. I needed some just a size bigger.

With that question, off we went on a scavenger hunt. Stopping first at their kitchen junk drawer, nope. No washers but who has such an organized junk drawer?? They have a second junk drawer near the back door, nope, that meant out to the storage buildings. Inside the first small building I felt a bit as if I were stepping back in time. I remembered my grandfather inside that building. All of his tools and various odds and ends perfectly organized. After checking all the small cubby holes and various shelves, there hanging from a beam at the ceiling, was a packet of washers. By sight alone, they appeared to be the right size. I told dad I would take those and let him know. They are the right size. I just have to find someone to help my son as I simply don’t have the strength needed to hold the plate in place. I can’t manage to contort myself into the position to where I can reach in and hold it while he tries to get a washer and nut on the bolt. He said if he could just get one in place, he could manage. If I only had some sort of miniature jack..

One thing though, it is only the first day of Autumn, here in North Carolina. There is still time before the really cold weather will arrive (I hope). Even if we have some cool nights, if patterns run as usual, the temperatures will stay in the really nice range for a while yet. Even if we have overly cool nights, I have blankets, sweaters and a nice space heater. I will be fine until I have one or the other operational. Who knows? I may even get creative and figure out a way to get it done myself. Channel the pioneer woman deep within. I managed to cut my own wood last year, I should be able to figure this out…right?

Back when I was working in the manufacturing plant, situations would arise that we would need to diagnose the problem and seek out solutions. Especially when it was a malfunction in the machinery. Though untrained in repairs, I had ran these machines enough that often enough I could see the problem and in the very least direct the technician in the right direction. Many times I was able to simply correct and move on myself or with the help of the operator.

I believe, that God gives us knowledge to be able to see, understand and often correct a problem. If we cannot, we are given the discernment to seek out who can make the repairs. It is important that we actually use the ability to discern who is truthful and who is not. Asking for recommendations, asking who had done the work needed for others and what they thought. Checking to see if there were any issues reported to any type of business bureaus. Making sure we are careful and precise in what we need and expect and that all parties know this and have it in writing. It doesn’t make it one hundred percent foolproof, but it gives you a safety net of sorts.

Once we have given our life to following Jesus, God does not simply allow us to drift alone in a sea of confusion. We have His Word in the Bible. We have places of worship, though it is important that we make sure it is a Bible believing church, one that preaches God’s word not the world’s. There are many people who share God’s message in ways that are true and understandable. They share the knowledge that will help all Believers grow and mature. But as with the ones sought for home repairs, it is more important to make sure that those you are listening to are sharing truth, God’s truth, not a half truth, not bent and twisted to suit their purpose. Like a spider they are out there, waiting to draw you into their web of lies and confusion, don’t fall prey to them.

Pray instead for understanding. Pray for the truth, for the right guidance, for the Holy Spirit to show you exactly what you need. We are not alone, never alone. Once you answer the call of “Follow me” God is always with you. The Holy spirit indwells within you. Pray for the peace, the strength, the courage, the hope and love that comes with faith. Life will not always go smoothly or as we would hope. There will be struggles,  battles and dark nights. It is in those times we grow and strengthen, especially if we trust in the One who loves us. He has given us that in writing.

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September Twenty-second; Ingredients For Better

Welcome Autumn, I guess.

The day is overcast, the temperature comfortable. Earlier in the day, my dogs were acting edgy, like there was something I needed to check on. When I went to the door I looked the way they were and heard my nephew’s chickens. It is the first time I have ever really heard them. They didn’t sound panicked though, still, I called mom to make sure that she was inside and okay and if my nephew was home. He was, so her thoughts were that he was out with the chickens or in the least would hear if something was bothering them. They have since grown quiet as have my dogs.Mom has called me several times today already. Most were vaguely important, but one was the reminder when I got a moment to move her large Christmas Cactus back inside the house. Her cactus is huge, I am doing well to keep mine alive.

I had hoped that when the windows in this room were replaced that there would be enough light in this room to have house plants that would live and hopefully thrive. It kind of works, though for some reason it seems that one must remember to water and feed those plants as well.

We can survive when given the basic needs, but to thrive, more is required. Food and water keeps us alive, but nutritious food helps the body to function more as it was designed. Exercising the body in the ways we are able, gives it better strength and functionality. Knowing how to read, write, count, allows us to function. Furthering that education, even in small steps, helps us to attain more out of life. It gives an understanding of what is going on and how we can make our way through. The basics are good, but like that cable service, more is better.

Similar to a recipe. Fried chicken is good, chicken cordon bleu is better. Shrimp for many is good, a low country broil takes it to a different level. Take the basic and add to that to increase in flavor. Take the basic in life and add to it to make it better.

There is also the fact that if we take away the ingredients that make the flavor off or bad, the meal is better. Chocolate added to milk is good.Mustard added to milk would not be good. (At least in my humble opinion)

If we gaze down at a newborn in our arms and make a decision to help this child grow to be good, we would add the ingredients of love, compassion, hope, respect for self and others, desire to learn, desire to work, a walk of faith. All while removing the bad, racism, hate, ignorance, entitlement, anger. Both lists can continue on, but the idea is there. For life to be good, we should attempt to put good things into ourselves and into life around us. My hope, is that as I go through each day, I manage to share some good. Like a ripple in a pond, hope and encouragement spreading outward.

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Day 264

Please no…

I seriously dislike it when the people from the various cable companies who are staked out in the big box store approach me.  I know they are doing a job, I know they are doing that job as they have been trained. I still wish they would not see me.

I know where they lurk in our local big box store. I usually look before I go that way to see if they are there. To see if they are already busy talking with someone, or to see if I need to take evasive measures. Today when mom and I were in the store she had me moving in circles. It was intended, it was as she remembered what she needed. We had already once gone by where the cable people were lurking, but they were busy and didn’t see us. Mom remembered something which meant going back in that direction. From where we were when she remembered, I simply started down an aisle that was not the domain of the  cable people. As we walked up to the display of what she wanted I heard a voice.

Cable Guy, “Double Trouble.” Which I ignored.

Cable Guy, “Hey Double Trouble.”

This time I looked up. Cable guy, “You two are double trouble right?”

Me, silently groaning. Please, no. At first I had looked at him trying to think if I should know him from somewhere, like social media, until I saw the XYZ cable company name embroidered onto his shirt.

Cable Guy, “You two showing this place what perfection looks like?”

Me, “We have XYZ cable, we have the whole works, there is nothing you can help me with.” I was polite, I was calm. I was adamant.

Cable Guy, “Okay……………….You aren’t moving are you?”

Me, staring now, but simply shakes my head no.

Cable Guy, “Well you two just continue showing the store how its done being awesome.” and finally walks away.

My mother finally speaks, “I bet he thinks I can’t talk since I never said a word.”Me, “Nah, he saw us talking before he walked up. Don’t worry about it. Which of these did you want?”

Still…after that conversation I really felt as if I needed a shower, as if I had been slimed or something. Maybe its just me, but after having been approached like that in the past, I really wish they would stop training their people to approach customers like that. BUT…I could in all honesty tell my son I was not rude. He actually thought it was funny when I told him that apparently those cable people are free range now since he was away from his table in the center aisle.


Last night, I walked into the bathroom to get my robe. Less than a half of an inch above where my robe was hanging, was a spider. Not a ginormous spider, but big enough. My son was still awake, I knocked on his door and asked if he would get the spider. After waiting, and his not getting the spider, I finally went into the kitchen, found a small plastic bowl, a piece of thin cardboard and went and captured the spider, took it to the back door and tossed the whole thing out into the dark. But I didn’t squish it.
This trying to be respectful, not rude, caring and not entitled, is tiring..but feels good.

Not the spider, just the first photo I found..
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September Twenty-first, An Anniversary, And An Understanding of the Importance of Preparations.

Thirty-two years ago.

Today was well, today. I spent the first of the morning sitting outside of my dad’s eye doctor while the doctor checked dad’s eye that he had somehow scratched. While it is much improved, he wanted dad to use a night salve to help keep it from drying. Which meant taking dad home, getting a bite to eat and then taking mom to get the medicines and what ever else she needed at the moment. A little later I was preparing my son’s favorite baked spaghetti as he was doing so much for everyone. He had taken his grandmother’s car to the place where he worked to check it over for her. He keeps an eye on it for her safety. That was why I was chauffeuring them about. Fine, you say, but what is the thirty-two year mention for? A memory, a moment in time, a fuse for growth.

What a memory. My son was only eight months old. I was working a job that had one of those schedules where you worked three days off four, switched to four days off three and somewhere in there was always a week off. I was in that week off period.

I had been doing something that I had up to that point not done. I was tracking a Hurricane named Hugo. I was watching all the maps and predictions and possibilities. On September twentieth, the weather prognosticators told everyone to batten down the hatches as we would possibly get some high winds. My husband was at work as he worked an afternoon shift at the bakery. He called just to chat on his break and asked what I was doing. When I told him I was putting away and securing anything that could be blown about he said something he never said afterwards. “It won’t come through here”. I shrugged, finished our conversation and then finished putting everything away.

I wish that I had done other things such as collect water in every possible container I possessed. I wish that I had gone and purchased batteries and non-perishable foods. But I didn’t because it was just supposed to be some high winds. We’re in the shadow of Charlotte, North Carolina USA. We were far enough inland that those storms at that intensity do not reach here. Were we ever in for a nightmare surprise.

I remember putting my son to bed at his usual time. I finished what I was doing, made sure that what was meant for my husband’s supper when he got home and then went to bed myself. I was exhausted from preparations so I barely recall him coming to bed. What woke me was when the radio that was softly playing on the head of the bed went silent. It came back momentarily, the fell silent not to come back. Then, I could hear the winds.

I got up and checked on my son, he was sleeping peacefully. I eased the door closed and walked through the dark house to the front door. It was very early in the morning. Two, three AM, I don’t recall, just that the darkness outside was very eerie. Yet, somehow I could see those big Oaks in the yard dancing crazily and bending nearly in half. The winds sounding like some demon from hell, shaking the house and howling on and on through the night. All night I paced, from the front door where I would peer out the small window, to my son’s bedroom. It was a wonder I didn’t wear a trench in the carpet.
By the time light finally began to appear, and we could step outside, we were able to see the disaster around us. But the miracles as well.

We had thirteen trees down around the house and yard. One in the front yard snapped in half but fell away from the house. Behind the house there were three trees of various size down, but not fully. All three had lodged in another tree stopping them from hitting the house. One behind our carport, one – the largest- behind the kitchen, and one- the scariest- behind my eight month old son’s bedroom. We had to get a tow truck out to pull the trees down in a way that they fell away from the house.

When we finally managed to clear a path out of the dirt road and try to reach a grocery store, they had been stripped clean. Feeling that trying to go anywhere else would be futile, we went back home. We had no electricity, no water, no batteries, but we did have our first gas grill. We could prepare what we did have in the freezer, we could heat the bottles from our son, we could hope the power we back soon. The search for ice began. It took days before we got word of a local ice plant having ice so we managed to join the line. Hoping for at least one bag.

We spent a week without power. My brother’s family two houses down, went two weeks. At that time his power came from one direction, ours from another. We found out that in the not too far away town where my paternal grandmother lived, my grandmother had electricity. In turns, we could go down, get a shower, fill up containers with water and do it all again.

After Hugo, it took me a long time to stop keeping a lot of nonperishable foods. I still have a small supply, but at that time, I looked like a survivalist. I will admit that when there are warnings of bad storms approaching that may cause power to be interrupted, I go into preparation mode. I fill up enough containers of water a family of eight would be supplied. There are only two of us here now me and my son. I do stock up for the critters as well. I make sure I have batteries. If it seems really bad, I fill the tub with water. I check my food supply, see that I have the various breads that may be needed. Are the cars filled with fuel? I make a list, and I check it twice, actually, I check it so many times the list falls apart. If it is winter and there may be the rare frozen stuff falling, I make sure I have dry firewood and matches.

I am preparing and prepared for what is being forecast. The storm that is coming, even as they may not be fully aware of the intensity. Even as they cannot say it won’t veer off in another direction or simply dissipate.

Thirty two years. I will say that for years, every time to winds began to kick up, I became terrified. I would sit and watch the trees go into this frenzied dance, swaying back and forth, crashing into each other, limbs falling. My heart would race, my breathing would be difficult, my nerves shot as I felt that night all over again. Tag it with what ever name you wish, it was all I could do to not crawl under my bed and hide.

Over the course of time, I have made a lot of changes. This past year especially.  Hugo was a nightmare. Hugo taught us that what is considered impossible is possible. The things we believed could not happen, can happen, and will. That distance is not always a preventative. That preparation is important even when facing what seems unlikely.

I have learned to not fear the winds. I was reminded often by friends, that God did not give us a spirit of fear. That is not of Him.

Over the past year, I have grown closer To God, stronger in my faith, more consistent in the following. In the times when I would feel the loneliness of grief, when the solitude brought on by the social distancing and the lack of a job would bring pain, I would be reminded. I would spend time speaking with God in prayer. When possible, I would be outside in what my son has called my thinking circle. It is my quiet place, even if the neighbors around me are enjoying life, even if the main roadway is busy, it is quiet there. Peace has filled me more during those time. I have found strength and courage I didn’t realize was mine. I know now. I know the gift that has been given to me, and to all who Follow.

My point here, is that while so many prepare for approaching storms. They hurry to stock up on water, groceries, batteries, fuel for cars of generators. They make their lists and check them until they fall apart. Preparing for something that may or may not happen. Preparing for something that will only last for so long. Even if there is destruction. Whether it is hurricane, tornado, earthquake, flash flood, blizzard or any other natural disaster, it arrives, it strikes its blows and ends.

We pick up, we clean up, we repair and we go forward. This is the temporary. This is the earthly. That is this life. What of  the next? Are we preparing for that? Are we seeking the One who holds eternity? Do we seek what He offers? The mercy, the saving grace, forgiveness, healing, peace, love?

The things of this world are but a moment in time. It is of utmost importance, that we prepare for a time that has no end.

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Day 263; Counting Change, Counting on Change

 The rain finally arrived.

It has been heavily overcast here for most of the day. It seemed that at any moment the rain would start falling, but it held off until just moments ago. Now, just after nine in the evening, I’m listening to the rain, tree frogs rejoicing and a few night birds determined to be heard. For now, I sit here, listening, and contemplating the day.

My son and I went today and purchased what we thought would repair the wood stove. We still didn’t get it repaired. Due to a sudden influx of shoppers, we couldn’t find the proper washers. He thought he had the right ones, but nope. It didn’t matter anyway as I simply don’t have the strength to hold that metal plate considering the weird angle I was having to try and manage it from. Hopefully he will drop by the handy dandy hardware store on his way home tomorrow and get the correct washers. Then maybe he can convince his cousin to give him a hand. If he can get one nut in place, he can manage the rest.

My son had actually followed me to the store,after we made the purchase he left for home and I headed to the Jeep dealership to pick up a bag of goodies for the Jeep Show and Shine coming up. (Yearly fundraiser for the Love Like Lauren Foundation). I parked my Jeep and got out to see a penny on the pavement right outside my driver’s door. 2017, the year my husband died. I went in and got the bag and left, the penny in my pocket. Then back to a different big box store for pet food and goodies for my son since he does so much for me. When I got back home the light was blinking on the answering machine.Mom, I had forgotten to call her.

While I was sitting here after talking with mom, it dawned on me that I needed to call and make an appointment for my dogs for shots that are due. When I called and told them I needed a Monday, I was told that they could do it today at 5PM. My son agreed to that so it was set. I need him to go because Bella and Molly have such different personalities. Bella is all alpha touch and drama queen while Molly is terrified. She has this super pitiful expression and refuses to go into the building. My son had to actually pick her up and carry her inside when we got there. When the vet came in to give the shots, I got them to give me a muzzle for Bella as she tends to be snappy. The vet gave her the shot before she realized what was happening and she didn’t even have time to growl. Molly took it like a champ, but really turned on the pitiful, but that mean man gave me an owie, look.  Since I had called mom before we left, I called to let them know we were back. It gets annoying, but if it keeps her from worrying, I’ll call her to ease her mind.

Be it every so humble, there’s no place like home.

If only it were so easy with everything else going on around us. If a phone call could calm the stress that we are all under. If only the rain falling outside could wash away the fears, the worries, the sickness, the dark emotions. There is so much going on around us that it is easy to become overwhelmed. It is easy, to lose track of what we want to happen, expect to happen, and what can really happen.

Because of the virus, a lot has happened. A lot of people have lost their jobs. A lot of people are in need of help financially. A lot of people are in need of medical treatments, and not just for Covid. A lot of companies are in desperate need of workers. A lot of companies have workers who have worked up to and beyond exhaustion. A lot of information and misinformation is being spread. A lot of people are reaching the breaking point.

If only the rain could wash away the frustrations, the fear, the multitude of events and emotions that are making life difficult. All of this is making it harder to get along.

Today, while I was in line to check out at the big box store, the lady checking out was paying in cash, and using a good bit of change. I wasn’t paying that much attention, I was fighting the desire for that big bar of special dark chocolate. The gentleman in front of me turned to face me at one point and muttered something a tad sarcastically about ‘counting out change’. I simply shrugged and said something along the lines of ‘we’ve all been there’. To which he said he’d never sunk that low and turned back around to watch the lady counting out change. I didn’t bother to mention that the store probably was very happy to receive every bit of change the lady had to offer.It really wasn’t that big of a deal. It didn’t take all that long. She finished, he checked out and then it was my turn.It didn’t take that long. I think I derailed his plan of getting me to get worked up and answer his rally cry to be annoyed and obnoxious. Why? For what purpose? Because you had to wait a few moments? Because you didn’t get to check your few purchases out quickly and get away?

I have some how found myself in many different groups on social media. Some I actively participate in and some I see and pretty much ignore. I belong to a couple groups for singles, I haven’t commented or attended a single meeting because every meet up that I have actually seen mentioned, were at clubs or bars. I don’t consume alcohol so there is no reason for me to be there. Many sell jewelry or cleaning supplies or weight reduction drinks or something. I don’t wear much jewelry, I have plenty of cleaning supplies and I don’t need the weight loss products, so I scroll right on by the posts. I belong to several groups and pages that support various charities. By now you are maybe thinking, so? What does that have to do with anything?

I have noticed since this nightmare we have been dealing with began, we are losing our understanding of how things work. All of those groups and pages have their own rules to follow. They set up what they can and can’t do. They set out what they will and will not allow. In the middle of all that is going on around us, it is too easy to grow frustrated and lose understanding of what can or can’t; will or won’t happen. Not because they don’t want to do something, but because to open that door, would be creating a nightmare. You can’t do for one, and not all.Without the resources, you can’t do for all. Just because the group or page or organization or facility, can’t respond to a need, doesn’t always mean it can’t be mentioned so that individuals can help as they are able. (Understanding that some groups actually do not allow it so as to keep potential drama down.)  Remembering, the circumstances the world is in, and that individuals may not be able to always contribute.

As I mentioned, it is obvious, that there are many needs among us. Jobs were lost, though there was extra money in unemployment checks, there were stimulus checks sent out, there are those who are still in need. I won’t deny that there are those who are still sitting with hands held out, there are also those who are searching for a job. There are those who are hungry, those who are fearful of losing and some have lost their home. Some are sick in various ways. The needs are many and great. That cannot be denied. Many are helping as they are able. Groups are handing out food and supplies for example. Just because you aren’t seeing the help, doesn’t mean it isn’t there. Just because a group in itself can’t pony up with help, doesn’t mean individual members won’t.

We have to remember and understand, we won’t always get what we want, when and the way we want. It may come in other ways, handled in a different manner. We shouldn’t be the guy turning around and mutter in sarcasm about counting change. We should be the ones who smile, who compliment employees who are doing their best, who leave just a little extra for a tip, who pay it forward every chance we get. We can, should we so choose, be the ones, who bring about a change in attitude, by making a change in ours.

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September Twentieth; If


I’m sitting here, working on yet another cup of coffee while watching the sun playing a game of peek-a-boo through the overcast skies. The trees are dancing in the winds of a potential storm. Its nearing the end of September, fall will official arrive in a couple of days. Leaves are already falling, beginning that slow spirally ballet from tree top to ground.  For now, the temperatures are still warm, comfortable. It is a typical day. A day like any other end of summer type day.

I wrote last night of the report that it is believed they have found the body of the twenty-two year old lady who had been missing. I saw reports this morning of where they have served search warrants on the home of the parents of the currently missing man who was most likely the last person to see Gabby alive.

There are many if’s here. If, it is in fact her. If he did in fact kill her or cause her injuries to which she succumbed. If, his parents knew. If, he is hiding left the country, left this life. If the authorities could only get all of the answers.

There are many if’s for the rest of us as well.

If- we taught our children respect. Not only for themselves but for others. Not only for the person, but for their belongings as well.

If- we taught our children not only respect, but an understanding of how to treat others. I’m seeing memes on social media that to an effect say, while parents are teaching their daughters how to protect themselves, how to avoid toxic and dangerous relationships, how to spot the red flags, parents should also be teaching their sons how to not be that toxic individual and how to treat girls. But girls also need to understand how to treat the guys respectfully as well. It does work both ways. Either gender can be toxic and abusive.

If- we would stop being such an entitled, self-righteous, arrogant society and realize that we were born with nothing, we will die with nothing. All that stuff that went into the tombs of pharaohs to go with them into the afterlife? It went to looters or museums. The only treasures that will be there for you in the afterlife, are the ones you stored there.

If- we would understand that no one is better, more important, more of anything than another:

If- we would only understand how precious life is, respect it for that. If only, not only for the unborn, not only for the elderly, but for all and everyone. We have no right to take a life.

If. A very small word, yet it has so great and vast a meaning and possibilities. If this or that had not happened then…If this or that had happened, then…If, we believed or trusted or understood, then…

There are many who say that the signs are right, that the end of this age is coming. That Jesus the Christ is returning soon. I cannot say they are or are not correct as the Bible tells us plainly that no one but God knows when the time will be. The signs according to the Bible are there though. It is promised, Jesus will return. It could be at any moment, are you ready? If He were to return today, to call those who believe in Him home, would you hear your name?

May I live each day in understanding, in knowledge, in belief in the Promise.
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