March Second; Through the Struggles, Through the Differences, Understanding is Found

I don’t make it any secret about how directionally challenged I am.

My son laughs and teases me in a good natured manner, but he really doesn’t understand the struggle. Then again, he is the person who can get in a vehicle and for any place local say, “I think such and such place is that way” and go straight there. He will use maps for out of state places but only as a back up. Me, I struggle to find my way locally.

Things like yesterday don’t help. My Jeep Compass has a compass among the many other things on the dash. As I drove I happened to glance down, it was telling me I was going north. How can that be? The interstate just up the road runs north and south, but it was not the direction of this particular road. Say you are looking at the letter t. The interstate would be the center part while the road I was on the cross piece..and yet, that was supposedly the same direction? How? I do not have an internal compass that will find true north. That is the main reason I tell folks when asking directions, give me landmarks. Do not under any circumstance or good intention tell me north or south, east or west. That will only confused the governor of the state of confusion. Which would be my by the way.

I also do not deny my technological challenges. My son tells me technology hates me, maybe. Granted it doesn’t help that when I have issues I hand everything to him with a mumbled, ‘help’. Letting him fix what I broke. For some reason my phone and my jeep have disagreements and won’t talk to each other. The blue tooth connection mysteriously severed. “Help” I did learn how to set the clock on the  Jeep. That doesn’t help me when I need to find somewhere new and the phone is silent and I’m trying to see the phone and find roads and not have an accident. My dash cam also has this thing about not liking anything placed near where it is plugged into the car. If I set my phone down there, the dash cam shuts off immediately. I move the phone, it comes back on. Cable issues maybe but its still annoying. I did recently find a phone holder that sits in the cup holder of the console. We won’t even discuss my computer.

In August, should I live so long, I will reach the age of sixty-five. I am still, a socially inept, socially awkward individual. Even as I am improving, I still struggle to find myself and my place. I want to be accepted but as me, not as one altered to fit social norms. And yet, I want me to not be too far outside the box that most find it best to avoid the weirdness that is me.

There is one thing though, that even with all of the challenges that is me, for which I am thankful. God made me, to be me, the me that I am. Directionally challenged, technologically challenged, socially challenged for a reason. It gives me an understanding of others and what they face just as my being a caner and domestic abuse survivor does. In conversation I can say I understand, and be truthful since I have been there. I can explain what I have done to help myself in the hope that what I share, gives at least a bit of hope to others.

More importantly, I know that no matter how many assumed faults that I think I have, God loves me just as I am. He guides me along the way and shows me how to accept myself and yet improve as I grow. He will not abandon me should I take a wrong turn. His love will not grow silent and leave me alone. He draws me to His side, to His peace and love. In Him, there is hope, love, acceptance. Through Him, through the challenges, I find strength and understanding. He is the one that when I break something, I can reach out and seek true help.  As He is for us all.

Life is a journey. As we travel, we will face challenges and struggles. Yet, we do not face them alone.

About rebecca s revels

A writer, a photographer, a cancer survivor. An adventurer of the mild kind, a lover of the simple pleasures such as long walks and chocolate. A Christian unashamed of my faith and a friend who is dependable and will encourage readily. Author of three self published books with more waiting to find their way to paper. An advocate of good things, a fighter against wrongs.
This entry was posted in education, encouragement, faith, healthy, honesty, inspiration, life's journey, questions, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to March Second; Through the Struggles, Through the Differences, Understanding is Found

  1. Dia Jae says:

    I call myself a directional dyslexic. I know how to get to places. I need time to think of left or right. I can’t even focus on north or south until after I grasp that concept! LOL

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