I was told about a site called givesendgo. It is an alternative to gofundme. Christian created and maintained. You can set up fundraising accounts for just about anything, self included. So I thought why not? It might be a way that I could earn a few dollars that would help supplement my social security. Yesterday I set up an account. Today, I deleted-canceled-closed that account.
I have mentioned before that I am very technologically challenged. I’m learning, or at least I’m trying to learn, but I have a way to go. I did manage to get the givesendgo campaign created and set up. The financial, collect the money part, no. Every time I thought I had it, something else would pop up that held errors or incomplete information. There were things that couldn’t be verified even though on the same page it said it was. I went to bed last night thinking I’d work on it today. Even as I was frustrated, worried and unsure if this was what I really wanted to do.
I did look at it briefly first thing this morning but logged out without doing anything at all. I still felt uncomfortable about the whole thing. It isn’t that I don’t trust the site, it is that this doesn’t feel right for me. It did and didn’t feel somewhat like internet panhandling. I felt as if I were taking matters into my own hands rather than trust in the Lord to take care of us. I felt…..greedy. As it is, we have what we need. Groceries in the house, gas in the cars and the clothing we need. It was those sudden extras that had me concerned. Even as they are getting paid, just not as quickly as I hoped. With that being the case, with needs being met, wanting more, seemed…wrong.
I thought about it, and decided that I would put up my Christmas tree and if there had been no donations I would delete the campaign. It was given extra time because my mother called me many times today. First for our usual morning call and then five or six times more. My dad also called asking if I were busy. I ended up during the day going down to walk their dog and also to help dad move some stuff from the back of his truck to his storage building. I then came home and put the tree up. Before I decorated it, I went to check the fundraising site. Nothing. I know that I hadn’t advertised it, but that was mainly because of the unverified parts. Still, with no donations, I decided this wasn’t meant to be so it was deleted-canceled-closed.
Once that was done, I went back to the tree. I brought the box holding the ornaments and lights for the tree inside and began checking everything. The lights for the tree, decided that they were done and the only place the were going was the trash. Checking what was outside, I brought a strand of colored lights in and wrapped the tree. I then used three small strands of white lights as well. Garlands of beads and then the ornaments. One step at a time, photo documents along the way. Once it was finished, I stood back considering how it looked. I’m satisfied with how it turned out.
I love seeing the lights and decorations for Christmas, just as I love watching the flames of a burning fire. There just seems to be something magical. There is a nostalgic feeling that comes as well as the love and peace. I didn’t decorate anything else, nothing else was set out..yet. My son walked in and made a comment on my using both color and white lights but also wondered if I wasn’t a bit early. Someone else asked the same thing, wasn’t it a bit early? Just a day or two as usually I put the tree up and the decorations out after dinner on Thanksgiving.
Sitting here now, the dogs are inside, the official cat probably in my son’s room while the outside cats are playing in the leaves out back. I can hear them as they run about, glad that they have access to under the house and warmth. There is a fire burning in the wood stove and hot coffee in my cup. My son has eaten and all is well. I know, we are blessed. Even as I consider that fund raising site, I’m glad I closed that down. I believe it is the same reason I won’t upgrade to a paid site to where I could have that donation button. its the same reason I won’t ask for help from friends. I’m not comfortable doing that, it simply doesn’t feel right. Maybe if I were producing material that I felt was beneficial and helpful for others I would feel differently. Maybe if I were in a more dire position, I would feel differently. But I don’t want to act rashly and improperly. I don’t want to ask, for the wrong reasons. https://www.biblehub.com/james/4-3.htm
I have what I need. I am learning to be content with having the necessities. The extras are not as important. The extras are materialistic clutter. I do wish that I could do more to help others, but I believe that will come when the time is right and proper. In the meantime, I do believe that I was right when I changed my mind and made the move to delete-cancel-close. God has made sure we have the essential, He will also provide and gift us with anything extra.