There are times when writing these can be a challenge. Many times the random words chosen seem to find ways to open doors and awaken thought processes long asleep. I often find myself baring myself in ways that I have never done before. My hope in doing such, is that somehow, the words I share may offer encouragement and plant seeds of understanding.
I have started on this twice already this morning, both times interrupted. Will the third time be a charm? Or three strikes and I’m out? The word for the day is reflection. Dictionary.com has a nice listing of the various meanings of reflection. I’m choosing not to put the list here.
When I made my first attempts on this, I was going with a comment on how I avoid mirrors and seeing my reflection as I see the passing of time and I am unsure of my thoughts. Which in itself brings about reflection. Not so much on my appearance, but on the reflections of my life in the past. And what my life reflects here in the present.
As one who was late in maturing emotionally and socially I made a great many mistakes. As a creative person with strong empathic tendencies, it meant I never fit into that perfectly shape, society expected standard. That also brought about mistakes. Most that I did not handle well. With no mentor to guide me, I was trapped in a labyrinth with end or escape. Which lead to making bad choices.
I could use each and every misstep I took as an excuse. I could allow them to let me become someone less. I will admit that some have and continue to hold me back, but as I learn and grow in knowledge, I also learn and grow in strength and the power the bad choices held over me has lessened over time. I know though, that there are times when I cannot help but reflect what is going on within my heart and thoughts. The times of missing those gone on. The times of struggles with needed repairs, with health, with finances. When the fear and worry within seeks to consume me and cause me to forget where my strength lies. In those moments of frustration and exhaustion, and I forget, where my rest waits. I see myself doing this, or my son calls me on it, and I see my reflection of allowing earthly concerns to overcome, preventing me from being who I seek to be.
If I were to be asked, what is it that you hope to reflect in your life, my answer would be simple. I hope to reflect Jesus. We reflect what we follow, what we allow to fill our time and minds. Even when we attempt to hide our actions and attitudes, they always manage to be seen. Even, if it is only through facial expressions. Fewer people are wearing masks, expressions can once again be seen clearly. Through the way one acts when they pass someone homeless and struggling. Through the way one treats others in general, children, pets. those offering service in any form. Actions, a reflection of attitude a reflection of the heart.
My desire, is to reflect compassion. It really isn’t all that difficult. To speak kindly, to allow one with less to go ahead of you in line. To hold a door open. To not park in a way that makes it difficult for the cars around you. To care for stray, dumped, lost animals. To watch out for the children.
My desire, is to reflect peace. People are going to have different opinions on everything. We can disagree without being nasty. There are going to be times that I don’t get my way. That someone may break in line ahead of me. That someone will make an unsafe move in traffic. I want to handle it in ways that is resolved calmly.
My desire is to reflect hope. That tomorrow will be better. That we can learn to get along. That we can repair the damage that has been done and build a better, stronger, more cooperative society. That we can find ways, to help, to believe, to strengthen.
My desire is to reflect courage. That I can find the belief in myself in the person God has made me to be. That I am capable. That we, as a society are capable of working toward what is right and true and strong.
My desire, is to reflect love. The love of God within me, overflowing to those around me. Love for people, who they are no matter their differences.
When I look in the mirror at my reflection, I hope that it is not the physical reflection I focus on, but the side of me that reflects faith and love. That I am showing, the peace that comes only from God and fills me. The strength and courage that grows as my faith grows and strengthens. My desire, is that my reflection is one more act of planting a seed.