I told my son earlier, that I thought I was laughing more. He didn’t see it, but then the me he sees most is usually the one in the middle of one crisis or other. Still having to be taught to slow down and listen. Everything is going to be fine, just calm down. Yet, like the stubborn toddler, I tend to mutter ‘but God…’ Yep. I can be and often am, one of those who wants answers and rescue, right now. Still working on that be still and wait.
Don’t get me wrong. I do know how blessed and taken care of my son and I are. Knowing that does tend to make me feel guilty when I plow through yet another ‘how are we going to do this???’ moment. I was sitting here staring at that storm door that is pretty much nothing but the frame of a storm door. I do have the glass back in, but its barely in. The top of the door, is open. There is nothing in that space. As I sat here this morning, there was this whispered idea, “you could purchase the wire and make it a screen door. Maybe later have glass or plexiglass cut to fit.” I bet gorilla glue would hold it in place.
The only place I went today, was down to my parent’s place to walk their dog. Dad finally wore mom down and they went to that new casino. I promised if they weren’t back I’d walk the fuzz. That isn’t her name but its what I’ve always called her, if I tried to call her by her name now I doubt she’d respond. I did wander down and take her for a walk about the yard. We didn’t see any crocodiles but she did take care of business.
I did some stuff around the house, but I mostly watched the kittens. I didn’t try to pick any of them up today but I did get to pet a couple of them. First when I put the food out, two of the kittens were so hungry they ignored the crazy lady petting them. Second when I walked out and spooked them and one was having a difficult time getting inside the hole. I managed to get a few pets in before it managed to slip the rest of the way inside. Whether my son has heard it or not, I do realize that I have been laughing more. It was odd at first, I had grown so accustomed to restraining my emotions that the only ones strong enough to show was annoyance and worry. But since I’ve been learning and growing, those are actually not as strong as they were. Money is the biggest issue. It shouldn’t be, there should be no worries or concerns what so ever about finances. Consider the lilies of the field
Matthew 6:25-34,Luke 12:22-3225 Therefore I say unto you, Be not anxious for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than the food, and the body than the raiment? 26 Behold the birds of the heaven, that they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; and your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are not ye of much more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add one cubit unto [a]the measure of his life? 28 And why are ye anxious concerning raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin: 29 yet I say unto you, that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 But if God doth so clothe the grass of the field, which to-day is, and to-morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith? 31 Be not therefore anxious, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? 32 For after all these things do the Gentiles seek; for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. 33 But seek ye first his kingdom, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. 34 Be not therefore anxious for the morrow: for the morrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.
I’m learning. But I’m human. As I learn and grow in strength and faith, I am more at peace and I am laughing more. The kittens in the back yard are hilarious. Watching them play among the grass, be amazed at just how quickly they can move when startled. Watching our official cat stare out the door at the interlopers of her domain.
While their barking annoys me from time to time, seeing the expressions they can have on their face brings a chuckle. When we were feeding them earlier, my son took Molly’s out to her without the can food. He said she looked at her bowl, up at him, back to the bowl and back at him before he caved in and came after her can of food. He said she was looking at him like “Dude…where’s the beef???”
I sat here for a while watching videos online. Just scrolling down from one to the next, covering a wide variety of material. All the while enjoying and laughing at what I was seeing.
I cannot help but believe, that this change has been brought about because of my growing faith and trust. The growing closeness of my relationship with God the Father and Jesus the Christ. The Holy Spirit within showering my heart with the results of that, which is peace, which is happiness. What Does the Bible Say About Happiness?