I didn’t sleep well last night. It seemed that everything was working against that happening. Aches and pains that seemed to come out of nowhere. That and not taking the NyQuil stuff that usually helps, meant a night of mostly dosing. I’m not unaccustomed to the nights of little sleep though. That has been happening since my husband died. Its not as big of a deal now that I’m not working. I was however worried that it was going to make today difficult as there were things going on.
I had made plans to meet with members of the Jeep group for the monthly 5K. If my foot was hurting, how could I walk? I really, honestly, came very close to not going. Then I decided that I wasn’t going to allow a little pain to stop me. I worked all through my cancer battle, this was nothing. I went, I will admit that I cut it a little short. I feared that I was about to start limping and hiking and limping just doesn’t go well together.
One of the members had brought their dog. I ended up helping hold onto the dog for a few moments at the end when they were making a video about a charity event coming up later on. It was easy, right up until people with another dog walked up. As I got him calmed from that, he noticed the squirrel in the park. When I say that dog was strong, believe me. But all ended up well and no squirrel were bothered.
After I got home, I talked with mom wondering if she had heard from the people coming out to pump her septic tank. They had called and said they should be out around three this afternoon. I needed to make sure so I could get my dog inside. Otherwise they would have gone insane since the truck would be pulling in my drive to back down behind mom’s house.
They showed when they said they would and got to work. My nephew helped the guy get the covering up enough to get the hose in and I walked as far away as I could and still be nosy. I wanted to be there in case I was needed to help distract dad so the guy could work. I was also hoping to see kittens but I figured with so many people around they were in hiding. Once the guy finished and collected his pay, my nephew and his kids prepared to refill the hole. They did need some old roofing shingles to cover where the seams were in the top of the tank. I told him that I thought there were some at the house, and I was right. His kids walked up with me and carried them back. I ended up helping a little in filling the hole back and getting the tank covered. He’s going to let the dirt settle some before trying to plant grass so that we won’t have a weird lump to try and mow over.
My son went to the race over in Charlotte tonight. His guy didn’t win, I’m not sure how he feels about the guy who did. My favorite came in second. I’m sure he’s taking his time about getting out of the mass of people as it was a full stadium.
Me, I managed to get my walking done. Pain be hanged, I was going to get my steps. 4.99 miles, 11,311 steps.
Which takes me to this thought. How determined are you to accomplish something? How easy is it for you to make an excuse to not do something? While what I did today were not life changing events, I look at it this way, if I had let myself make an excuse not to accomplish things today, it would be so much easier tomorrow to not. Today’s events were important, but more important in reminding me, I can. Even if I don’t feel one hundred percent, I can. Even if I don’t want to, I can. Even if…what ever…I can. When I did it, I felt much better about myself and the day. Not that I would have felt the failure if I didn’t, but I would not have been as content.
In watching the race, sitting here in my chair, in my house, one room away from my kitchen, I watched as the announcers talked about the driver who won. If I heard correctly, he had never won on a track this long. Now he has, because he never quit trying.
As I walked today, I began thinking about the partially written manuscript about the loss of my husband and dealing with the grief that I have battled since. It was never finished, because I quit. I have nothing but time, I believe I need to go back to working on that once again. I didn’t finish because I quit. It was never published because I quit. Its time to take that project back up again and this time, not quit.
What about you, what have you started but not finished yet?
Words from The Dirt Road 
I started writing a book about Heaven, sorting through a stack of paperwork, focusing on moving out of this park, etc.. but I made baby steps today towards one of those goals.
All steps, even and sometimes especially baby steps count. Each step a movement forward towards the goal.
You will finish it when you’re ready, I’m sure of that … stay safe and healthy.
Thank you. I feel you are right. One of the issues was facing that pain all over again. I think though, that the time has arrived to face that and move forward.
Without sounding trite or cliched, maybe the writing process will help. I certainly hope so.
I believe that it does. Writing allows one to -get those feelings out of their head and onto the page- thereby releasing you from the nagging. If you feel that you need too remember, its there, if you don’t want to think of it anymore, its there ready to be picked up later. So yes, cliched or not, it is truth. Thank you.
You are so welcome.
Mine was writing my manuscript about mental health. Can’t find time due to my full time job 😦
That does make it difficult. A full tie job saps a lot of energy and time right out of you.