Is Someone Trying to Tell me Something?

Its taken what seems like forever, but I finally got through all of my email notifications. Most are from the blogs I follow. Every one of them with something to share.  Today especially it seems. I lost track of how many “do it afraid” and “no regrets” messages I read through today.

I will be honest and admit that on days when I open my email to over two hundred messages, I don’t, because I simply can’t, read every word of every blog post.  Even in my retired, no real schedule, no real plans, state, I can’t sit here all day. So I open the blog post and I visually scan the contents. If the message strikes a chord within, I will back up and read what is shared. If when I finish reading, or if the photograph or artwork sparks an emotion, I will comment. Otherwise I try to at least react to every post because someone took the time and effort to create it, that in itself deserves acknowledgement. 

Today though. Today has been unique.

I have done more reading today than I have since I returned to serious blogging.  Today, I believe that someone was trying to tell me something. I do believe I should listen. 

I have not hidden the fact that I am uncomfortable -putting myself out there. I’ve been told several times I am timid. So if I must go out, I stay most times to myself, hoping to be seen and yet hoping to be ignored. Going out into the world means taking a chance, taking a risk for which I am uncomfortable.  Instead I stay here within my comfort zone.

I wish for others to have days filled with grand adventures, while I myself hide away and only dream of them for myself. I hope for others to spend time with others in laughter and fun. While I hideaway wishing, yet insecure. 

In my imagination I can be brave, bold and strong. In those dreams I save worlds and create new ones. In those worlds I am the popular one, the wise, beautiful and daring. Nothing stops me-especially not fear. Yet, the reality is fear does stop me.

I sit here all safe and secure, watching others actually live, while I merely survive. I can speak grand words, and share heart felt truths and mindful information, because I am safely hidden away here. Tucked away on a nondescript, dead end, dirt road, in a quiet area of the county. Here where any misstep isn’t a public event or spectacle that would live in infamy. Though I many share one from time to time, words don’t carry the same lasting imagery as actually seeing an event. 

 I have over the course of time and for various reasons, allowed fear to cripple me. With all of the inner strengths and abilities I have been given, to still allow myself to act in such a manner is disappointing. And frustrating. And wrong. 

There are countless books that have been written on doing it afraid, doing it scared, pushing through. While I don’t currently own any of them, I’ve seen them and understand the premise. We have not been given a spirit of fear. Fear, as an emotion, is a natural human trait, while allowing fear to hold control over us is considered sinful. Biblical fear, is not fear as in afraid, but fear as in respect for God. The fear that cripples us, considered a lack of trust and faith. The article this link is for also contains two parts within that discuss fear.

There is also this site: which has a more simple explanation.

 So fear itself is not a sin for it is an emotion created by God. It is when we allow that fear to control and distract us from God and our faith, that it becomes a sin.So now I sit here after having read the blogs and the information in the linked articles and I wonder, how does that help me? What can I glean from all I’ve read today?

 First off I have to readily say that there is no way that God above has protected me and brought me this far for me to sit here hiding. There is no way, He would want me afraid to enjoy the life He has given me. That doesn’t mean for me to go out and do things that would endanger me (orothers), but do things that would be actually living. 

I believe, that when we live the life we have been given, and live it in the right way, that brings glory to Him. When we live in kindness and compassion with concern for those around us, we show His love. 

I believe, that when we step out of our so called protective, comfort zone, we are living and showing our faith.

I believe, that one of the gifts that I have been given, is the ability to write and share through that writing my thoughts, and beliefs. So there is in itself nothing wrong with the writing. It is the hiding behind it instead of going out and living. it is the hiding, rather than the going out with and among others to show that we can have life abundant in Him. That doesn’t necessarily mean big houses, fancy cars and a bank account that would rival the richest of the rich. It means living in joy, in compassion, in peace, in hope, in love. And sharing those with those around us.

God has been merciful to me. He has shown me great love and grace. How can I remain in hiding?

 Even though I may get nervous, I need to go out and live. It is by the living that I learn to overcome that fear. It is by spending more time in studying God’s Word, and placing that within my heart, that I can free myself from the self imposed chains and prison. 

This is not the first time I have been poked. This is not the first time I have had this message placed before me. I really need to pay attention and when faced with something, remember to just do it afraid. Then, there would be no regrets.

About rebecca s revels

A writer, a photographer, a cancer survivor. An adventurer of the mild kind, a lover of the simple pleasures such as long walks and chocolate. A Christian unashamed of my faith and a friend who is dependable and will encourage readily. Author of three self published books with more waiting to find their way to paper. An advocate of good things, a fighter against wrongs.
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