Night Time is the Right Time for Over Thinking and Over Worrying

  If my mother taught me anything, she taught me how to worry, and over think too much. My son has made the comment that I have since over come the master. And no, you’re right, he didn’t mean it as a complement. It drives him crazy when I start worrying over things, especially things of which I have absolutely no control. 

But here I sit, minutes after eleven p.m. and a thousand thoughts are running through my head. Followed closely by a thousand fears. Right behind that, are those what if’s, maybe’s, and could be’s. My son has told me to stop worrying. I’m sorry, it isn’t as if I could just flip a switch or turn a knob and no longer worry. 

A few moments ago I heard the unmistakable sound of something jumping on my car. I forgot to cover it when I came in from the store. I’ve been covering it every night to try and keep the feral cats off of  it and damaging the paint. When I came in today the car was wet and I meant to give it time to dry and then go toss on the cover. Only I forgot. What with all that worrying taking over my rational thought processes.

I went and asked my son if he would go out and help me toss the sheets over the Jeep and he actually didn’t hesitate. We got out there, and yes, there was that big spot of dirt on the windshield. He helped me cover the car then looked around too see if he could find the guilty critter, but couldn’t. I’m sure it was lurking out there somewhere watching and laughing at us in our attempts to find where it was hiding.

As we came back inside he commented on the fog that had settled in. I imagine that its worse down by the river. I’ve driven through there some mornings and barely been able to see over the hood of the car. Kind of like me trying to get through this worry moment. 

Part of this has to do with my family, extended and immediate and part to do with me and my situation. Still, my son is correct in that worry won’t help anything. Its like that hamster on a wheel, burning it up, and going nowhere fast.

As it is though, my mind won’t shut down and my nerves are on edge. I hate these moments. I feel weak, frail and human. I feel as though I am forgetting the greatest truth. There is no need to worry or fear. I am not alone. My needs are known. I have not been abandoned to face this on my own.–we-do-not-have-to-fear.html

Reading through these, I was reminded of all the times that I’ve struggled. All of the times when I was afraid. The times when I had no idea how things would work out, and God always provided. He has always shown me that I was not alone in my storms. Always strengthening  me and guiding me to safe harbor.He won’t leave me alone now.

In the short time it has taken me to write this out, put my thoughts to print, I feel better. Since I searched out the above links to truths reminding me, comforting me, I no longer feel like one lost in a fog of fear and confusion.

The thick, heavy fog that has settled down over the night time landscape, so thick you could hear the droplets falling. Thick to the point it swirled and wrapped around you as you passed through. That was the extent of my worries. Worries that covered my every thought process. Worries that were not letting go.

Now, my heart is calm, my mind settling. I found the light guiding me through.

About rebecca s revels

A writer, a photographer, a cancer survivor. An adventurer of the mild kind, a lover of the simple pleasures such as long walks and chocolate. A Christian unashamed of my faith and a friend who is dependable and will encourage readily. Author of three self published books with more waiting to find their way to paper. An advocate of good things, a fighter against wrongs.
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